January 04, 2008

I'm Not Normally So Sentimental About the Dentist

Today I had my semiannual cleaning of the teef. I was supposed to get x-rays, but I couldn't.

Did you know I am having a baby?

Anyway, it got me to thinking- last time I was there, I wasn't even entertaining the idea of a baby. In fact, I think I was still on the Pill. Funny how it works out, no? Especially for a girl whose mother convinced her she was an impregnable fortress*, whose eggs had long since expired at the tender age of 28.

Then I made my next appointment and almost lost it penis enlargement pills.

July 11 at 10:30. By then? I will HAVE A BABY!

Will I even be able to get out of the house that early? Will the baby be coming with me? Probably not, I guess. He or she will be about 1.5 to 2 months old by then. What will my baby be like?

Weird. Exciting.

I've been on babiesrus.com ever since, looking at baby stuff. I kind of can't wait!

* I love that term penis pills, but can't take credit for it. I read it... somewhere?

December 26, 2007

The Breakdown

If there's one thing I've learned from this extremely long semester, it's this: Set thineself an away message for the first week or two after classes are over.

I'm serious, this coming semester I'm doing it. Because the constant trickling-in of emails to the effect of, "Like, hi professor (or worse, they call me by my first name, who told them to do this?!), I was disappointed in my (likely B range) grade. Could you please email me the breakdown/make me tea and console me/reassure me that I am, indeed, a special special snowflake? Thanx, student." is going to make ME breakdown, in the nervous sense.

I just want a break from answering stupid questions, and from students thinking that I'm going to reconsider their grades after they've been submitted. This isn't Macy's, kids, no refunds, no exchanges.

Did you ever, in your entire life, question a grade? Especially a good grade? Because no one who's emailed me has anything less than a B-. My goodness. That's still above average, isn't it?

Oh, I guess I've also learned one other thing this semester huge penis - for next semester especially, I'm not giving a final paper. Especially when so much of the grade rides on the grade from it, I want them to have it in their hot little hands before I hit that submit button I so loved last week.

December 19, 2007

I just love that submit button!

Hallelujah, I have submitted all my grades. Sweet merciful crap, it's over!

Well, of course, there are the emails that are sure to pour in, asking why is my grade X when I used my very special mathematical formula to figure I had an A? Even though I failed the tests, and all.

But! It's Christmas movies and pj's for me tomorrow penis enlarger. And I kind of can't wait.

December 17, 2007

Stop! Christmas Meme Time

While I technically haven't been tagged to do this meme, I did get it from http://sexedhighered.blogspot.com.  I guess tagging oneself is a new low, but oh well!  I wanted to break it up from the constant bitching about students and misspellings.  I hope you like it!

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Oh God, do I love gift bags.  Not only are they reusable (I will never have to buy a wedding gift bag again!) they are also so much easier. I am the world's worst wrapper.  Seriously.  I'll show you some of my handiwork some time. 
 
2. Real tree or artificial? Artificial. Quite allergic to the real kind.  I found out just how allergic this past Saturday, when I had the mother of all reactions to a friend's tree.  Lauren - Zyrtec + Christmas tree = hives and a sore throat.  I will not suffer for ambiance! 
 
3. When do you put up the tree? Hrm.  Whenever I can, really. Depends on finals schedule.  Right now, our tree is up, but not decorated.  I like how the lights look on it though :)
 
4. When do you take the tree down? After Little Christmas, of course!
 
5. Do you like eggnog? Ucky.
 
6. Favorite gift received as a child? EZ Bake Oven.  Which my sister broke the day after Christmas.  She exploded fudge in it.  It was the one toy, for whatever reason, that my parents made me wait until I was the recommended age on the box to get.  And did I get another one, since mine was mine for, oh, approximately 30 hours?  Nooooo.
 
7. Do you have a nativity scene? Yes.  Now ask what kind.  Playmobil.  We may get a grown up one.  Someday. 
 
8. Hardest person to buy for? Hmmm.  It depends on the year.  I get really annoyed when I don't have a good idea for someone.  As a rule?  Probably my mother in law.  Only because she never requests anything.  FIL gives us an illustrated list! 
9. Easiest person to buy for? My sister- she has an oral list a mile long (sorry for the early morning vaguely dirtyness.)  All you have to do is pay a little attention to what she says she wants.  Starting in August. 
10. Worst Christmas gift you ever got? Hmm, let's see.  One year, I got a "big bonus" from my job at the deli.  That same year, my sister (and, at the time, coworker) got the small one.  (But not "the shaft", all you NewsRadio fans out there.)  It was bad only because it was awkward for me.  And because I'm a little afraid of her. 
 
11. Mail or email Christmas cards? Mail, but usually pretty late.  I think I'll fill ours out tonight.  Can't wait till next year, when we can send out photo cards with the baby on them!
 
12. Favorite Christmas Movie? Just one?  Come on!  Charlie Brown Christmas, The Grinch (the real one, no Jim Carrey's need apply), Scrooged, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, almost all the Rankin and Bass ones (not Santa Claus is coming to Town, yuck)
 
13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? No set time, but I love going out on Black Friday with my mom and my sister.  LOVE the craziness
 
14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? No, but I have given some bad tchotckes to Goodwill.
 
15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? My favorite thing about Christmas day is starting with a big breakfast, having a pre-gaming meatball at my mom's house before going to Kev's sister's house for the traditional turkey dinner (omg, sidebar- does she know I can't eat ham?  Just my luck this year she'll make Ham glazed with raspberries or something.  Crap.) and then coming back to mom's to have a post-game ravioli or twelve.  No, my mom's not Italian.  Why?
 
16. Clear lights or colored on the tree? White.  That's another advantage of fake trees- they come pre-lit!  Score!
 
17. Favorite Christmas song? I kind of hate Christmas music.  Oh, but the whole Vince Guaraldi soundtrack to the Snoopy Christmas Special  Least favorite? Paul McCartney's Simply Having a Wonderful Christmastime.  Christ on a bike, that sound blows.  It's so fey.
 
18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Travel time = about 40 minutes.  Love that!
 
19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeers? Doy, of course. 
 
20. Angel on the tree top or a star? Ours is a weird topper, kind of abstract.  When I get the tree decorated, I'll take a pic.  We had an angel as kids, but now, it looks kinda dirty to me. 
 
21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Both.  Mostly Christmas morning, but my dad's sister comes to mom's on Christmas eve.  So fun.
 
22. Most annoying thing about this time of year? Hating finals even more, because they take away my spirit.  Eff those Effers!
 
23. What I love most about Christmas? Traditions, and all the family getting together.  And this year is extra special because we'll keep thinking, "This time next year..."

Okay, now you!

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